A dear friend of mine and my parents broke down in front of us today. It hit me so incredibly hard, and instilled so much fear in me. It also instilled faith and confidence in me. Our friend announced to us, through tears, that she is leaving her husband. Her husband of 7+ years. The father of her 2 children. The one she thought she would love forever. The one who is not showing any emotion. The one who refuses counselling and a fresh start. This had been a long time coming, of course, and I am completely supportive of her decision. But watching her almost crumble in front of us destroyed me. Her children are the sweetest, and very young. She will moving out of province to start over, get back on her feet while staying with her parents. He is not going with her and the kids.
The one statement she made is stuck in my mind though..."Love does not conquer all". In her case, it is true. She loves him as much as she possibly can, and has stood by his side through thick and thin. She also loves him enough to know that she needs to leave, to get a fresh start, and do what is best for her kids. Her kids are amazing, and I will miss them dearly. So many times I have gone to visit my parents, and I get the little boy babbling away to me. I went to their birthday party. I've helped her rescue a cat. I've spent many times talking over the fence with her. I knew that the situation between them was not good, and I understand her decision. It will be better for her, for her children, and in the long run, for him. He was not ready...
Love does conquer all at times. But that bond must be strong and indefinite before a situation arises. Love can stand the tests of time, but sometimes these tests are hard to overcome and the love suffers.
Today, a woman made a difficult and life changing decision. Some women will not leave relationships that they are not happy with. She definitely made me realize that love is something you both need to work on. She gave everything until she couldn't give anymore. Love is not to be taken for granted. It needs to be nurtured, enjoyed and cherished. It is a life long journey. It is life altering. Love is what you make of it, and what you put into it.
I try my best to give as much as I can. We feed off of each other, we support each other, we know each other, we challenge each other, and we strengthen each other. We need each other, sometimes more than either one of us realize. Sure, we have our moments, but they are always resolved quickly before they can escalate. Things have not been easy, but we have experienced more than alot of couples have in longer periods of time. We are stronger now than ever, and we share a very strong bond. I don't take love for granted, after all, it could end sooner than we would want it to.
So I may complain at times, but I know that deep down everything is alright. We have our bad days, but there's always going to be a tomorrow.
Speaking of tomorrow....it's my birthday! Yep, onto a happier subject. Shopping with mom and dad in the morning, a visit with Andy's parents in the afternoon, then for dinner with Grams, then for cake with my parents. Should be a good day, nice and simple! And we have decided on Heritage Park for monday. Can't wait!
Should try to get some sleep... my back is really flaring up, so we shall see... Cheers!
1 comment:
It is always shocking when marriages break up. It just goes to show you that marriage is HARD. Love is HARD. It is not just something you can leave, you need to work at it. So many people don't want to work at it. They think it should be like in the movies. It isn't quite that simple! There will always be seasons of hardship in any relationship. (Jonathan and I have had our share!) But, with God, time, energy and a deep-seeded commitment, we have promised to be in it for the long haul. That's what it takes.
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